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Evil Prefects

from The Post Office Tower by Ian Evans

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The lyrics are based on a short story, which I started to plan. It’s about a man waking up with amnesia and (as he pieces together who he is) realising that he’s an incredibly evil person.


Morning, I woke up
Somewhere, I don’t know
A clinic, somewhere
I’ve lost memories

I don’t know myself
I’m strange in my clothes
I got put in this school
I think I’m about 17

Don’t turn your back on me
I’ll give you both barrels
I’ll make you famous
I’ll dust you up and down

And now it seems that governments, should represent and not control
But what if those in charge (all like me) were evil

Now I try to be kind
But I find that I don’t care, just who I cut down
I’m finding out who I really am

I haunt these corridors
With the master’s daughter
Now on a pile of opera cloaks…
Prefect and orator

Your pain gives me such a wonderful life


* I’m strange in my clothes – This phrase came from a song on the True Colours album by Split Enz
* I’ll make you famous – This was a quote from something, but I’m not sure what…. In this context, it means to kill someone (hence causing them to be in the news). Perhaps it also refers to the devilish charm of a svengali manager
* I’ll dust you up and down – This phrase means to beat someone in a fight. It was inspired by a similar line in The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen by Alan Moore, which I love to bits. It was made into a really terrible film!
* The master’s daughter – It’s a commonly held myth (amongst romantic men like me) that being nasty is more attractive to women than being nice. This song is partly about whether it would be fun to be evil and (of course) the character in the song would have to be devilishly attractive
* On a pile of opera cloaks – This quote came from a Viz cartoon called, “Raffles the Gentleman Thug.” His character is similar to the schoolboy character in my song and he has some excellent turns of phrase. A pile of opera cloaks refers to an elicit location for a sexual liaison, in a theatre cloak room


from The Post Office Tower, released January 6, 2006
Ian Evans, all instruments and singing


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Ian Evans UK

Pop/experimental/rock musician and songwriter from London

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