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from Gallows Man by Ian Evans

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Manuka honey, Kobe and truffle mandolins
Prunier, gentleman’s relish, quince from Fortnam’s and tansy poisoning
Barkham Blue and Fairley Wallop
Bloody Mary Oysters
I do not like green eggs and ham
I never have enjoyed Banting

Marmite and Weetabix in Edwardian England
Asterix and the feast
Kedgeree, Max Tunra’s soup, Banana Bread beer and pork scratchings
Butterfield diet, Pie Minister…
IHOP’s not a pharaoh
It,s Philip de Rothchild my love
Baked Bree and Scottish tablet fudge

… And if it’s 4:20, we’ll have Rox martinis
We’ll have everything I can’t eat!
Fluffernutters, bull-shots, Makers Mark, pickles in Co-Ops
The Camberwell Flying Fish!
I have no guilty pleasures - every pleasure is always guilt free
All natural lemon and lime flavours
My Granddad’s tricks with an after Eight Mint

Lex says, “He lies like a hairy egg”
Rock and chips with a spine track
Geales in Notting Hill or the Castle Climbing chippy on Green Lanes
HP Sauce, Larks’ tongues in aspic, Salt n’ Sos, Crepe Suzettes
“McCallan for ladies, Laphroig for Men, everyone on Talisker by 10 past 10”

You always eat the best banana (as Graham Garden would advise ya’) Or else you’re only making untrue savings
Mum’s shouldn’t show that they take the smallest portions
I love Sarastro’s avocados… Like a ripe fruit lusting for the knife
I’d eat you like a land shark
Now it’s triple-decker sponge cakes chaps

Disaronno, Gorgonzola and pickles
Geales (or that great one that’s near to Poole Quay)

You’d go well with a warm fire and sweet pud


from Gallows Man, released May 12, 2010


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Ian Evans UK

Pop/experimental/rock musician and songwriter from London

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